The Maven



Every Wednesday Ross Rubin publishes Switched On, an opinion column about consumer technology, multimedia, and digital entertainment on the engadget website. Today’s Switched On’s first birthday, so wish Switched On a happy birthday, why don’t you?



The Maven
Once upon a midnight madness sale I sauntered, steeped in sadness
Through the shiny piles and aisles composing my computer store.
Suddenly there came a rapping. Skeet skeet skeet. Had I been napping?
Energy, it had been sapping from my soul for weeks or more.
Yea, those loathsome customers had chilled my being for weeks or more.
Back-to-school had drained my core....

...On his pattern kept repeating and I watched my cash depleting
As he dispatched questions like blind bulls before the matador.
Each request brought new retort in just like when Leo Laporte ‘n’
His ex-co-host Patrick Norton would save screens in days of yore —
Oh, to live those fond remembered years of TechTV of yore
Ere the odious G4....


The full poem after the jump.

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